Once again it is you ( All three parts in a go)

 

A SHORT STORY BY VISHWAS GAUTAM.

That day was the 367th day of our breakup and at the last moment, I was thinking "you" while leaving that city and will never be back to that place ,I wish.

I was leaving many things and taking only an engineering degree along with some memories,some friends and a name "Shreya" in my heart.

Standing on the platform of Ghaziabad railway station in between the various odd sounds I was waiting for my upcoming journey meanwhile I was thinking everything of my past ,what I have left and what I have gain in these past four years.

In that time my train had arrived and my couch D-3 was in front of me and after many scrimmage I was on my seat 102 ,alongside on seat 101 a well dressed , attractive girl sitting next to me reading a novel like a deep reader,lost in her own life like everything was still for her .I was adjusting my luggage and trying to adjust on my seat meanwhile she got some disturbance that I didn't want to do and then she raised her eyes and looked upon me ,after taking some glimpses of her face I started coming back from my thoughts of past into the present that was full of her far cry vibes and within a second she again drowned in her book. As the train was getting faster ,my past thoughts also get started to coming back in my mind as they tried to overcome the speed of train and totally wanted to control me. Again ,I lost in my last four years of "engineering" ,that city ,that College fun , friends,hostel wickedness and Shreya. I was totally wandering in the college grounds,canteen and bunking the classes in my imagination ,that once used to be true. Then ,I suddenly realised someone shooked my shoulder,oh, that was the novel reading girl sitting next me. I said,yes ? She said,"Are u going to Lucknow?" I got totally shocked and started thinking about "shreya" and an incomplete love story of mine was totally replicated in my mind in the matter of seconds because "shreya belongs to Lucknow". She again asked me " Are u going to Lucknow?" In the second time I answered,"Unfortunately no".She asked what? I answered,"let it be , actually,I am going to aligarh." She smiled and very sweetly said " I am also going to Aligarh" .This piece of conversation brought me again in the reality. This conversation didn't stop here ,I asked, From where in aligarh? She answered, and some of that kind of words exchanged between us.Then I moved my focus on the novel that she was reading and asked her " which novel are you reading?" She replied"Men without women". I answered involuntary "oh great",then again I asked " Is this your hobby of reading or for just passing the time you are reading this novel? "She replied ," I'm very passionate about reading" and then she asked " what's your opinion about reading ? " I was smiling firstly then answered "आओगे कभी कमरे में हमारे,तो किताबों के सिवाय कुछ और न पाओगे".she laughed and said " oh so you are a reader who also loves shayaris" I said yes absolutely, then she added " शहर, शॉक सब एक ही है , लगता है मंजिल एक ओर ही है " then with a knee-jerk I said " waah waah ".

With this conversation I started to move away from my thoughts which entangled me for a long time . Her smile , shining face ,sunken eyes ,was like a novel in itself and I was reading this novel like a curious reader who always try to discover something new in the every page ,in the every line ,in the every word. She was telling me about Herself,her hobbies ,how she reached in her college,how she was enjoying her life and charmed me with her melodious voice ,and I was just listening her like a poetry. In between all this ,she said "aligarh has arrived" . I reacted "what" like I hadn't heard anything. She again said " aligarh has arrived" .I guess first time in my life I hadn't any excitement upon my arrival at my home . I was sitting still like I wanted to listen her more ,then she said let's go .I said "yeah" very outrageously and then we both started moving out from the train carrying the luggage and searching for the exit gate. After moving our eyes ,we found that exit ,then we started moving in opposite direction.

Suddenly a voice came , " हे सुनो", I turned back and said " Yes". She asked 'what is your name?" And I said " vishwas" and very eagerly I asked her "And your name?"

She said 'Shreya '. I was totally in a different world and my mind was empty, I was just seeing her and then slowly lost her sight of and then I said to myself " once again ,it is you" .

its been a week, but I usually thought about that girl like even now I'm at the station and looking at her . I don't know how I was feeling like this, may be because of my past love or may be I wanted to search a new love life like I was in a dillema of thoughts. Jumping into the future from the past memories is the toughest process of life sometimes, you need to cut the previous threads along with joining the new ones. There are chances that you have nightmares sometime of your past,you need to fight these nightmares for entering into a new morning which is tough though.

Like every day ,,,that day in the morning I woke up with the previous thoughts,but, today I got a call from one friend of mine ,Abhi .

He wanted to take me for a ride for eating kachodi's that are very famous street food in our aligarh. I talked to him in a very negative note and refused to come with him ,but he insisted me a lot ,so I had to go . We both were wandering in the city after a long ,we both shared a lot of thoughts ,and expelled a lot of philosophy.

After all this in the evening,we both sat at the side of a highway in a silence ,out of the shore of the city ,and looking towards the sunken sun and then suddenly abhi asked "what happened,tell me?"

I can't get over shreya ,she left me without any reason, without saying any word ,left me empty ,I want to forget her ,but I just can't" ,I said this to abhi in a go . Then abhi said " Look ,some people come and go from our life so we can look ourselves changing and can identify our other sides and their leaving us empty is for filling ourselves with some other beautiful things " ,these words of abhi gave me some positive vibes and then he added " You will be fine,don't worry". I just smiled and shook my head .Then ,we started talking other things ,then he asked " Don't you use insta? ,I sent you various posts ,but you didn't reacted " . I said" I don't use insta , uninstalled it for a long". He said " ok " and then in the evening after a long ride I was back at my home .

On that night before going in the deep sea of sleep ,I was thinking about shreya as usual.

Some words of abhi gave me some energy but couldn't change my habits of thinking her every night so easily.

Suddenly,I took my phone and installed insta ,,then I saw various notifications, messages, but I saw a request named " shreya".

सांसों की जरूरत है जैसे, जिंदगी के लिए,

एक सनम चाहिए, आशिकी के लिए,

These lines of Kumar Sanu in the loud voice was hitting my mind when I was in that auto-rikshaw at my way to the cafe meanwhile I was thinking about the past 2 weeks ,that insta notification,and all that was happened in those two weeks.

Those two weeks brought a lot for me , a new hope ,a new willingness ,a new energy shreya contacted me then we talked ,knew each other.

Suddenly that auto driver said "भैया आगया आपका कैफे" ,and brought me back from my thoughts. I moved out after giving a 20 rupees note to the driver and make way to the cafe .

After entering,i was looking all around and suddenly my eyes stucked off on a seat where a beautiful,well dressed,smiling girl with long hair was waiting for me , i smiled and moved towards her and very nervously , excitedly said "Hye" to her ,then she roused and came near to me and said hello and gave me a half hug ,that hug made me more nervous.

Then we made each other a little more comfortable and then started some chit chats and shared some laughs.

She said then should we order something? I said sure ,then she ordered some food .

We shared a little bit about each other meanwhile waiting for the food.

After sometime the waiter was there with the food , she put up the spoon and started serving to me ,i looked towards her with a little smile and said thanks to her .

Then we started the lunch and sharing the little details about each other. In all this the 1 hour 45 mins had passed in a go like time had wings so that it was flying .

After all this she said we should go i have a class in the evening,i asked oh what class i mean what are you doing ?

She laughed and answered i am preparing for the masters after the graduation.

I said ok great and smiled ,and then we stood up ,smiled to each other and i said see you soon and we left .

We then started talking, sharing more about ourselves to each other over social media ,calls ,very frequently. Her arrival ,her presence,her little things ,made me a energetic ,happy person again ,and 3 months have passed with all these,long Lasting talks over the call and with 7 meetings with her made me like alive again.

One day in the morning when I is was sitting in my balcony with a cup of coffee and looking towards the rising sun and thinking about the love that grown up a little in my heart .

EVERY LOVE IS THE FIRST LOVE ,IF ANY LOVE IS SECOND OR THIRD THEN U HAVE NOT FOUND ANYTHING,YOU ARE ON THE SAME PITCH . EVERY PERSON LOVE IN THE VERY FIRST WAY,HIS ESSENCE HIS PRESENCE HIS ARRIVAL IS ALWAYS THE FIRST.

I was feeling like the very first everything for her . I shared all this with Abhi,he said I'm happy to see you happy ,I'm with you ,and then he added 'you should say to her about everything and before all this ask her how she is feeling and what she want ' .

I decided to talk to her and asked her to meet . I dropped a text ,' Hey Shreya ,how are you? ,Can we meet whenever you are free? ' and started waiting like i was taking to her like very first time ,i was feeling nervous and checking my phone again and again .

So finally,on that evening my phone beeped ,i quickly checked ,yes this was shreya's text ,i opened and then read " hey, I'm fine ,how are you ?. Yes we can meet for sure ,' after reading this i filled with joy and started typing with lots of happy emojis,

And then a new text was on my screen ,' hey ,can you drop me to the airport on that sunday ? , I have got admission in MIT USA , so I'm leaving next week ,we can also meet then .'

My fingers cleared the text from my message bar, and my smile, my joyness has wiped out .

I texted OK ,see you on Sunday ,send me the timings .

And then closed my phone ,threw it away .

That sunday had arrived ,i was waiting for her and then she had arrived ,i quickly disappeared all my emotions and started smiling after seeing her. She was in the red suit ,,a beautiful glow on the face ,and a confidence in her smile and lots of goals in her eyes .

Then she said ,let's go . I said yes let's go .

Then after a 4 hour travell we were on IG airport ,she was standing in front of me ,looking into my eyes ,and then she said thank you for being with me in that time I never felt that you were a stranger once , I hope you will be fine ,i will miss you ' then she hugged me .

I was standing still ,said nothing. She kept standing for a while like waiting that i would say something and asked ,' कुछ कहोगे नही?' ,,I said 'take care' . And then I returned back and said ' THIS TIME ITS NOT YOU' .

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